Could it be that technology is contributing to our isolation as military families and military members?
When I was in the Army (forever ago) cards played a huge role in our everyday interactions. We played cards in the field, on the weekends, during Sergeant?s Time, during our ?hurry up and wait? moments, or even during working hours because there was only so much parking lot to pick up. Seriously, I use to be able to play a mean game of Spades.
During these times my fellow soldiers, NCOs and officers were able to check up on me, see what was going on in my life, how I was adjusting, dissect my moods, and get a feel for my state of mind. As we moved into those positions, (me getting out and Dude continuing on) we would have his soldiers over, and their families. We got to know them by playing cards. We noticed who was not showing up, who might be having a hard time, and we would hear about what was going on with them.
The cards gave us on opportunity to let down some barriers and some walls. The cards were a gateway to feeling connected, and having a way to feel not so alone or separated from real people.
The cards allowed us to joke about each other, smile, hit each other?s arms, laugh, pout, and call names. The cards offered a litmus test of the state of mind of each person playing. They offered opportunity to open up real conversations, encouragement, or even just stress relief.
Then came the cell phones. Instead of wiping out a deck of cards in the slow waiting moments of the day, soldiers pulled out their phones checking messages, calling home, and playing games. Video games took over and closed off the conversation between plays and the dealing of cards. Everyone became engaged but not with each other.
Is it possible that that natural break from my home, family, and friends that allowed me to connect with people in my military life more closely, and to depend on them, to trust them, and to confide in them isn?t happening for today?s Soldiers and Military Families because technology doesn?t allow them to separate from who they use to be and become who they are? Could this be part of the issue revolving around the suicides, the isolation, and the loneliness?
Is it possible that shutting down some of our electronic connections would help alleviate or lessen these issues that are plaguing our military and their families? Could it be that cards, a slow paced game, or just a puzzle could open us up to real connections again?
I am not saying that this is the answer but it might not hurt.
We had soldiers over for the holidays and I was shocked at the lack of traditional game knowledge there was. We made them play. We taught them the basics of card edict (may have been some poking fun). We laughed. We heard stories of their families, their traditions, and how they use to see their parents playing cards (I know throws me into the old category). We got to know them. We got to know their looks of frustration, when they don?t understand something, and when they were plotting a move.
So, I gave away my card games, I sent them with soldiers that were drawn in by the need to just sit around a table with real people across from them and play. I hope they do play and often because maybe just maybe they could find their salvation in that deck of cards.
Tags: Christina Piper, communication, her war, her war her voice, military life
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